Most marriages are in a good place when you decide to try and have kids (if you don't have a woops that is).
An early stress can come from the pressure of "baby making". Sex is no longer for pleasure, it has a purpose...and a time...and as time goes on without conception, a position....a time of day...a diet...hormone shots....testing etc. None of those are "good" for a marriage.
So now your pregnant with or without the stress of trying to conceive. If the wife is anything like me, life changes from the moment you find out your pregnant. The worry officially begins.
I'm going to miscarry. The baby is going to be deformed. The baby is going to be a freak because I didn't take the right vitamins or because I ate soft cheese or because I sat in the jacuzzi before I knew I was pregnant or because I drank...A LOT...before I knew I was pregnant....the insanity is OVERBEARING!
So now said wife is anxious and stressed for her unborn baby's future, not to mention pregnant (insert copious amount of hormones here)...and terrified for the physical changes to come.
Let's go to the husband. Financial stress of supporting a family, college funds and the like overwhelm his mind. The changes to his wife's body and mood are terrifying, but he is supposed to be the perfect, loving husband now more than ever and not show weakness. And sex? Well, that is just scary now...but still a natural male need...that's a problem! And what about his freedom and guys nights out?
Everything is about to change and the impending doom mixed with excitement and hundreds of other emotions can easily beat the crap out of a marriage.
Now we have 40 weeks of emotional roller coasters on both sides. Even assuming everything goes well with the pregnancy and baby, the couple is still under significant pressure of the impending changes about to come.
Wife goes into labor. Husband feels powerless. Wife gives birth. Husband gets a too close view of the process. My husbands response was, "that was THE most national geographic shit I've ever seen". Wife feels like she just gave birth (like crap, ok....you feel like crap right after you deliver your first baby) and both are exhausted and overwhelmed with emotions.
Now go home and play house with your new role as parents....to be continued.
About this blog
If you're looking for me to brag about how cute my kids are (which they are) or talk about how much weight I did or didn't lose this week, you are in the wrong place! I have a Facebook account for that. This blog is about the blunt truths of parenting, tips and tricks of the trade, some addicting mommy junk and all the other disgusting hilarity that ensues when you have kids...especially two kids only 12 months apart like myself.