Just Call CPS: I am only one

Kids get hurt. It happens. Still a sad sight when it does!

This past weekend we went to a quaint little town as a family. Daddy wanted to run into a delicate trinket store, a no go for the kids.

So the kids and I spent a few minutes alone like we do every other day of our lives when daddy works. Unfortunately, things went bad quickly.

Bubbi fell and scraped her shin and knee. No biggie. Time to head to the car anyways as daddy would only be a few minutes. So I buckle Bubbi into her seat and clean her scrapes.

Boo is directed to hold onto the chain in between two metal posts. He is within arms reach and I can see him out of the corner of my eye. He is a good listener and only needs to wait while I quickly clean Bubbi's leg before I buckle him in on the other side.

Thud, scream and Boo is gone from the corner of my eye!!!

AHHH! I look over to see Boo getting off the floor with asphalt nastiness in his hair. He's trying to cry, but doing that gasping for air thing. Poor dude must have flipped over the top of the chain he was "holding" on to. Ok, mommy kiss it better.

Then he turns up to look at me and this is what I see...

Holy crap! A goose egg from hell that is bleeding!!! WHERE IS DADDY! NEED ASSISTANCE!

I console Boo and wait for what seemed like hours (less than five minutes) until daddy comes to the car (champ Boo had stopped crying after only a minute or two). The minute he walks up I burst into tears. He sees the damage and runs to a restaurant to grab Boo some ice.

Boo's fine. Bubbi ate it over a pile of sticks an hour later and gashed up the same leg a little more before we made it to the safety of home (and pants). Mommy needed a drink. Long day. Being only one person, one mommy with more than one kid, can be rough...for everyone!

My Morning: Too much shopping

So today, like any other stay at home mom, I had to take the kids with me to run a few errands (so makes me miss my lunch breaks at work).

First stop Sam's Club, a warehouse membership store in my area. Kids did great. Well, Boo did great and Bubbi tried to stand up in the cart a few times...nothing too bad.

Next stop BabiesRUs. We tore the place up. I let them check out every isle of toys and cleaned up after them (though I must brag that they mostly put the toys back where they belonged when they were done...however most still leaves 49 out of 100 toys for mommy to pick up). Again, a little hectic but nothing too bad. Worst thing was probably Boo begging for stuff, something he just now started to do. Yuck.

Onto get new shoes. Why? Well, Boo lost ONE shoe to the brand new $30 ones I just bought him. So I bought cheap $5 ones...that TIE with LACES! STUPID! Now he can't do them by himself and he thinks its awesome to knot them. Bubbi like to completely unlace them every chance she gets.

So 2 weeks of having one pair of shoes that fits with laces, time to buy some new shoes.

Back to the store. The lady whips out the shoes sizer and Boo says "sissy first". Bubbi does like its, well, as painless as getting your damn foot sized. Boo? He runs away screaming and f-ing hides! Find him and try to get him to physically place his foot on the apparently flaming, man eating metal foot sizer while, you guessed it, Bubbi runs and hides. WTF?

Not even close to getting an acurate messurment for Boo, I drop him (oops, literally) and run to chase Bubbi down. I'm no joke that screaming mom in public that should never have had kids. I promise frozen yogurt to any child that sits in the stroller and behaves. So now everyone is in the stupid stroller.

I grab some flipping Crocs, try them on his feet and check out. Bubbi wiggles free and is again running a muck while I ditch my wallet and Boo to go chase her down, yes, again.

We leave. Thank god.

At this point I would have literally had to beat and bend the crap out of Bubbi to get her back in the seat so I let her walk holding my hand to the car. Almost there she pulls a fast one and runs to the curb to balance walk on it! AGAIN! AWESOME MOM!

Grab her shove the kids and the shoes in the car, warning Bubbi that if she has one more bad behavior she will not get her treat. As Boo tries to slide past her to get into his seat she dead locks him between her shoes and the chair. He's flipping out, but not screaming yet because she has the wind knocked out of him!

BUBBI! NO NO! NO TREAT!

She lets go and they both cry in unison. Yes, I am getting dirty looks from the old people who just parked next to me.

We drive through McDonald's to get Boo's "frozen yogurt" (really a fruit and yogurt parfait). Bubbi cries when she sees I really didn't get her one. I cry too because I feel so bad, but know she needs to start taking me seriously.

So I look back and this is what I see...

AHHH! What a mess! The really stupid part? I gave this to the kids just a few days ago in the car and they did the same thing! Why would I be so stupid as to do it twice, I don't know. I don't know.

And of course, here is Bubbi with her sad face sans her treat...

Just Call CPS: Bubbi in the airport

I forget who I am sometimes and like to play supermom. So, being supemom and all, I flew alone with both kids to Arizona to visit with my parents and grandma last November.

No, you read that correctly, I FLEW ALONE WITH AN 18 MONTH OLD AND A 2.5 YEAR OLD. I'm stupid, you can say it because it is so true.

Going there was tough, but we made it ok. I got lots of laughs as I trolleyed the kids through the airports on their ride-on suitcases attached to each other like a train. Boo has Trunki - Terrance Blue and Bubbi has Trunki - Trixie Pink.

Yes, they both fell off several times. The best fall was when we were getting off the moving sidewalk at the Skyharbor airport. Bubbi, being closest to me, made it off fine. Kinda just kept going on my way instead of waiting to be sure Boo made it off well...oops. Mom brain. Well, he somersaulted head first off the end of the dam thing. I died laughing of course. He cried for a second and laughed too.

That was that as far as drama on the trip there.
We get there basically no problem.

Ok, so now time to go home. Because I had my supermom hat on (don't worry, I don't really have one let alone wear one...if you do, well, I won't judge...publicly) of course I booked the flight for the perfect am return between breakfast and nap.

Getting through the airport to the terminal was a bit rough. They fell off a few times and everyone was tired from 5 days away from their own bed. We paid three times more than we should have for some pizza and sat ourselves and the Trunki's down at a kiddy table. Bubbi booted to a boarding flight so I quickly weighed my odds and ditched the crap to go grab her. Boo followed because he's like that (oh hell no you aren't leaving me here alone...I know this could take awhile).

I start walking back to said kiddy table with one kid's hand in each of mine. Bubbi decided it would be comedic to drop her feet out and slow our short journey back to our stuff. As a reflex, I squeeze her hand and pull upward to try and prevent her from dropping to the floor.

A pop. A scream....more screams and cries from Bubbi. Ugg. That must have not felt very well and/or she's being her snooty self and mad she can't drop to the floor and crawl away back to the boarding area. 

A minute passes and she's still crying. My kids are rockstars and get over even the worst owie in a few seconds. Something isn't right. OMG didn't something make a pop sound when she dropped to her feet? OMG I BROKER HER ARM! OR HER HAND! She isn't moving her entire left arm, fingers etc at all and she's still screaming.

Ok, gather our crap and waddle over to the nearest person who is working here. They walk me over to the customer service counter. They call 911. The paramedics show up and can't do much but suggest we go to the nearest hospital in an ambulance. But my flight leaves in 5 minutes! CAN'T YOU JUST FIX HER! And yes, we were almost going to board when the poop hit the fan...

I try to call my husband, but he can't hear anything over Bubbi's screams. They put me on the stretcher holding hysterical Bubbi and plant my superhero Boo, who is just being amazing well behaved, between my legs. Then they wheel me through a small portition of the airport and right down the TARMAC (yes, the "road" the airplains cruise on)! Mortified, but Boo was loving his upclose and personal airport tour.

We get to the closest emergency room that happens to be a children's hospital. The doctor touched her arm to examine it, she screamed, he said, "there". Her elbow had been dislocated. Thank god no brakes. 

OMG I dislocated her elbow?! 

Turns out the common name is nursemaid's elbow or arm. Its fairly common until children reach about age 5 when their bones are fully developed.

Even though it was a totall accident (I wasn't even mad or being rough when it happened), I swore CPS (Child Protective Services) was going to come question me. When I spoke to our pediatrician, he just laughed at me and reassured me its common. I'm still waiting.


The aftermath:

My mom picked us up from the hospital and we spent a few extra hours with her and my dad. She brought us back to the airport and recieved a special pass to actually walk the kids and I to the plane gate until we boarded (think standard process pre 9-11).

The flight had a stop so it was twice as long as our other flight. The kids didn't nap. It was hell. They were devils. They rubbed lolipops on the man next to us while I cried. The man was in a suit. We lived.

In hindsight, this was a blessing in disguise. My daddy died two weeks later. I cherish the extra time we spent with him while we waited for our later flight.

Plus I was kindly reminded I'm not supermom.