Boo-isms: Kids say the darndest things

I know kids say funny things, but it is so flipping funny when your own do! And it starts early. Boo could only saw a few words. I dropped something in the sink when he was 16 mos old and said, "Shit!" Boo's response was "owie". Shit was my go to word when I stubbed my toe etc until that first day Boo threw me under the bus.

~ After telling Boo that my computer was broken so we couldn't watch a cow get milked on you tube, he said, "Me a man me can fix it...me a man, mom"...DUH!

~ When Boo mentioned the wooden statue in the corner of a man crouching, I told him it was fake. His response, "No mom, dead...he dead"...yes, we keep dead people in our house.

~ I was in the shower and Boo ran up to the glass door shouting, "Daddy said Fu**, Daddy said Fu**, Daddy said Fu**...." clear as day, over and over. I tried to ignore him as parenting books suggest, but he just got louder. I finally told him to go tell daddy...great mommy fix-all response.

~ As I was putting on my bra, Boo asked, "Where you put that mommy?" I thought to make sure I understood his questions and then replied, "on my boobs". He responds, "No!!! On your nipples!"...well he wasn't wrong.

~ Boo wanted to show the sitter how he could go potty standing up...just like daddy. He gave a play-by-play of every little detail of how daddy pees....down to the last wiggle and pull. I don't know who was more embarrassed, me or her...or daddy!

~ This one again throws me under the bus. Bubbi kept going up to Boo and hitting him. He came to me and said, "Bubbi pissing me off". Ugg. Ok, I get it...I need to clean up the language!

~ Last but not least, Boo spewed this one out yesterday. Boo was looking for his tool and asked me, "Where's my f**ing banger?" I didn't really believe it until he said it five more times. Daddy dropped the F-bomb that morning, so it was all on him. And yes, we had a talk (both the boys and myself).

Not sure why I tried to hard to get him into my preschool of choice...my hell raiser is going to get kicked out the first week anyways.